Navigating Grief & Loss as a Business Owner
As I write this journal, I am sitting on an airplane (for the first time since March 2020, but that’s another story!) en route to Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada. An unexpected trip in response to the recent news that my father-in-law passed away. Naturally, I am feeling a lot… sad, in trust, exhausted, grateful, highly sensitive, a strange sense of calm, supported, on edge, loved, overwhelmed.
I’ve mentioned that I have the privilege of not only being the Co-Founder of Costron + Co, but also the Owner and Founder of Find Your Voice Music Therapy. Working in these self employed contexts (as well as my current teaching position with the Acadia University Music Therapy Department) does not provide the traditional “bereavement leave” that many employees receive. Plans, adaptations, and considerations were needed to ensure that I could take space to truly honour my grief and loss.
I’d like to share with you some of the steps I’ve taken over the years to prepare my business ventures for the unexpected as a self-employed entrepreneur. I hope my story will give you some ideas about how you can be more prepared and able to honour yourself, your team, and your business.
The Financials Foundation
Flashback to 2014 - the beginning of my self employment work. I am fortunate that the launch of my Heart Centred business had the guidance of Jacquie Costron. She helped me to ensure I had a system in place so my financials were secure when unforeseen circumstances arose. And those unexpected twists and turns of life will always show up at some point in your entrepreneurial journey.
Having part of your monthly income set aside will allow flexibility and ease to take time off when demanding life events occur.
For this recent trip, my partner and I also decided to continue with our previously scheduled vacation, which had been booked on dates immediately following this family time. We felt it was critical to honour our heart with personal time to rest and recharge in our own way, at our own pace, after being with family, giving and receiving support, and dealing with affairs.
This additional time off wouldn’t have been possible without the financial affairs being in order through the support of our Financial Planner.
Let’s Get Practical
The following business day after hearing the news of my father-in-law’s passing, I took stock of my work responsibilities and tasks. I decided (in collaboration and discussion with loved ones) that, rather than taking time off right away, I would spend a full week in the office taking care of the work essentials up front. Not an easy task in the first few days after hearing this news!
But I decided that this approach would allow me to clear and check off what was needed. Then, I could fully land and be present in family and personal heart centred spaces. During this time, I also took stock of anything I could pause until I was back at the office.
I made sure to email all the relevant folkx about the nature of my workflow pause, and unapologetically set an out of office from October 11th - 30th message, which included a decreased email response time and period fully away from the office.
Having those practical details taken care of, by doing those administrative tasks before leaving, made it possible to have a meaningful experience with family and a restorative break with my partner afterwards.
Side note, Costron + Co is here in Light + Love always. To support your heart centered leadership journey, with the systems, financials, marketing, you name it. We got you! Book a complimentary Discovery Call with us anytime!
The Dream Team
When we work for ourselves, we don’t always have the opportunity to be able to delegate work while we’re away. It may not be financially possible, or we may not have connected with the right team members yet.
Recently, with both Costron + Co and Find Your Voice Music Therapy, I’ve entered new spaces in appointing management, leadership, and operations roles. The best part of this is knowing that I can rely on my folkx through shared team values and a culture of trust.
It warmed my heart and set my mind at ease to hear my beautiful team tangibly stating that they have my back - and each others’ - during this time of grief and loss in my life.
Being grateful is an understatement. I was able to take the time I needed, knowing that the people I work with were willing, able, and thrilled to collaboratively take over work with our clients and community, for as long as I needed.
Protect Your Energy Bubble
Everyday, multiple times a day, I began to check in (more than I normally do) on the relational interactions I was involved in or planned to be involved in. As the keeper of my energy field I decided what came into my bubble. I was very mindful, and accepted, that other people’s actions, words, or behaviours could significantly impact me, intentionally or otherwise.
As an empath who’s developed (and continues to develop) high self awareness, it became apparent that I needed to lay on the self-nourishment even more than normal. Compassionate energy from my loving community ensured I was able to protect, nurture, and support myself.
My body was drawn towards spaces of inclusivity, compassion, loving kindness, and forgiveness. I let go, releasing expectations on self, because I needed simplicity and inner peace to journey through into a space of radiance and aliveness.
With this immense and meaningful support, I made the conscious choice that some energy was honoured and loved from a distance, not fully embodying what the other person was saying or doing.
Hello Sweet Sensitivity
Quite often I’ve had a history of not being okay in moments like this. (For additional context please read past Costron + Co Journal series “Dark to Light” Performing in Pain and Loving Your Suffering, where I share more deeply about my journey through anxiety and panic attacks).
If you are struggling to get the financial planning, administrative support, skilled team, and healing energy you need to grow your business, please contact us at Costron + Co. We’d love to have a coffee with you, listen to what you need, and discuss how we may be of service. As humans and as entrepreneurs, we are not meant to do this alone.
In the meantime, I continue this Heart Centred Business and Life journey, feeling grateful for my reflection, integration, and embodiment practices. As I witness the intentional movement from dark to light spaces, I know I am building my capacity to be of loving service.
I can see my father-in-law now, in his grace and wisdom, speaking about ways to honour life through radical acceptance of what is, surrounded by Divine Love.
Warmly,
Mackenzie
